As a parent, you can help make this transition time easier by:

• Make sure your athlete is going to bed at a reasonable time. Summer sleep schedules were lax at best around my house so it is time to recalibrate the kids’ sleep schedules. I aim to have my 9 year old in bed between 9 and 9:30 on school nights. She can sleep in until 7 so that gives her plenty of time to rest. My 13 and 15 year old have to get up earlier but don’t seem to need quite as much sleep so they go to bed no later than 10 – closer to 9:30 on night’s where the homework load is light.
• Make sure your athlete is adequately fueled. Long school days mean less opportunity for snacking but it also means that they will be hungrier when you see them after school. Start with a balanced breakfast – no a frozen waffle on its own does not count. Encourage your athlete to help pack their lunch or at least give you input so the chance of them eating it all is better.  If you are going straight from school to practice, make sure you provide a healthy mini-meal to refuel their systems (check our list of Healthy Snacks and Mini Meal Ideas). After workout try a tall glass of chocolate milk and a banana or bagel for immediate muscle recovery!
• Communicate with teachers! If your child is still in elementary school, definitely let their teacher know what days they have sports practice. Many teachers will be willing to give homework at the beginning of the week so that you can focus on homework on off days, or at least conquer the more time intensive pieces on non-sports days. For middle school and high school students, it is a great time to learn time management skills. My kids have learned how to take advantage of in-school study halls and extra class time to get a jump on homework so they don’t have as much to deal with after school.
• Allow for downtime. Be sure not to completely over schedule your child these first few weeks. Add activities incrementally and allow for some relaxation time. Time to read, play, enjoy family time and just chill is just as essential for kids as the sports they do!

As a coach, you can help by:

• Being aware of the transition that your athletes are dealing with. Just acknowledging the new schedule and challenges will go a long way to helping the children relax.
• Taking a few minutes to communicate with your athletes. When we start practice we have the girls all line up first so we can give them any pre-practice information, greet them and we usually go down the line and ask them each how their day was or some silly question. It helps the girls change gears and it helps facilitate the coach/athlete bond.
• Stressing the importance of school. Remind your athletes that school comes first. If they need an extra 15 minutes at the beginning of practice to finish up homework, give it to them. As the year goes on they will find their stride and will learn to manage the homework/practice balance better.  Allow athletes to leave practice early on night’s where they need to study for a big test or have a larger than normal homework load.
• Adjusting practice intensity. Know your athletes and know the signs of fatigue. The first few weeks of school you may need to adjust the intensity, number repetitions and lower your expectations a bit.

Years of experience from the coaching side and now from the parenting side have taught me that kids are resilient, they adapt and even the busiest schedule can be a positive thing – IF – parents and coaches are working together with the athletes as a TEAM.

Do you have tips for making the transition from the lazy days of summer back to the structure of balancing school and sports? If so – share them in the comments below! We can all benefit from working to support our athletes.

Looking for more ways to change up the warm up routine? Try:

• A game of tag
• Play soccer
• Build an obstacle course
• Play Simon Says
• Play Duck, Duck, Goose
• Have relay races and athletes jog in place or do jumping jacks while waiting for their turn
• Play Here, There, Everywhere

So change things up a bit this summer and watch your athletes faces light up! Chances are, you will have a better workout if things are not always the same old stuff. For more ideas on how to add some fun to your workouts check out my post called “Incorporating Fun into Workouts.” Afterall, sports should be fun!

Level 5 Gymnastics Bar Routine Perfect 10? – click above to view or watch on YouTube – I originally saw it on CoachingGymnastics.

For any gymnast, coach, judge or experienced gymnastics parent, watching that video will bring a smile to your face and probably a few head nods, too. For those of you who are not familiar with the way gymnastics works, you can still get something out of the video.

The premise of the video is that little Suzie got an 8.45 on her Level 5 bar routine. She thought she did great and in her mind, deserves a 10. As her coach breaks down the routine and points out the places where the judges took deductions, Suzie isn’t buying it and decides her coach is just being mean. And herein lies the opportunity for the adults in Suzie’s life to work together and teach her how to remove the “person” from the “gymnastics.”

Gymnasts and other athletes who perform in front of a panel of judges (ice skaters, divers, synchronized swimmers, competitive dancers and cheerleaders) need to be taught that the scores they receive are based on a list of criteria and how well their PERFORMANCE met those criteria at that moment for that set of judges. It has nothing to do with whether the judges LIKE THEM AS A PERSON or not.

I actually judged competitive level gymnastics (up to Level 9) for a few years and really enjoyed it, but it was hard. It is hard to take a mandatory deduction for a fall on beam when you know that gymnast has probably performed the skill 100 times successfully in the weeks prior to the competition. It’s hard to decide if the split leap is within the margin of error for the 180 degree requirement when you only have a split second (no pun intended) to decide and no instant repaly. It’s hard to go through a floor routine and make sure you correctly identify every skill and give the gymnast credit for the requirements of the routine and come up with the correct starting value.

But, like everything else, it takes practice. After judging up to 96 gymnasts in a session (then multiply that by 3-6 sessions on any given weekend) what has to happen is that you judge the body in motion in front of you. You don’t notice the pigtails or missing two front teeth. You don’t have time. You have to account for every skill and every deduction and make sure the score you award is within a certain range compared to the judge sitting next to you. You want the gymnasts to succeed. You’d love to give a perfect 10, because that means you just watched the most beautiful and technically correct routine of the day, but that rarely happens.

Does favoritism ever happen? Of course it does. Judges are  human. But, it shouldn’t and a judge who takes the position seriously will not let the color of the leotard, the size of the gymnast, or her personal tastes influence the job at hand.

And back to Suzie. As much as she wants to think her routine was perfect, the more important things to stress are:

• Have you been working on corrections from the last performance at practice?
• Do you understand what mistakes you made so you can learn from them?
• Did you try your hardest?
• Did you have fun?

Answers of yes to those questions are more important than the fleeting feeling of receiving a perfect 10. Scores matter, but the quality of effort and performance are much more important! Teach this to the athletes from day one and you will have kids who take that skill and can apply it to all areas of life.

Let’s get caught up.

After 26 years of coaching gymnastics, 13 at the same gym, I have decided to take a leave of absence for a while. My own kids sports schedules are getting harder and harder for me to keep up with, and if I could have a clone, all would be great. Add to that my Dad is having both knees replaced this fall, my need to spend more time building up my own websites (like this one), making time for more fitness and golf time for me, and you can see why I just have to take a break. Deciding to step away from coaching was probably the hardest thing I have had to do in many years, but for now, it is the right thing for me to do. The SuperMom cape is off and I will just wear the SportsParent hat for a while.

Here are some “related” links that you will find interesting:

• Speaking of sports parents, I wrote an article for Kellogg’s Snackpicks on Kids Sports Snacks – in other words, what kind of snacks to bring if you happen to be in charge of half-time or post-game snacks for your child’s team. There is also a great snack planning sheet you can download with it!
• Since my Dad is having his knees replaced and my gymnast daughter wants to be a surgeon, we visited one of our favorite sites last night – EdHeads.org – and performed our own virtual knee replacement surgery. Let me tell you, EdHeads is just cool! From a virtual hip replacement to designing the ultimate cell phone to investigating a crash scene, the site really gives kids the opportunity to explore some hi-tech skill sets in an age appropriate setting. Go check it out!
• One of the things I am trying to find more time for in my busy schedule is running. Years ago I ran 3-4 times a week and I just loved the way it made me feel. Then kids happened and I let my own fitness take a back seat to my kids. Now that they are all busy in their own sports I have set a goal – I want to run a 5K race this spring. I have been training since May and while the return to the miles is a little slow, I’m fine with that. One of my friends just introduced me to a site called SeeMommyRun.com which allows you to find other moms in your area who want to get together to train. What at great support resource! Between that, keeping up with my online friends at DailyMile.com and my NikePlus sensor, I think I have all the support I need now to reach my goals!
• The new season of BigBreak has started and it is really getting me excited to play golf at Half Moon Bay in a few weeks! I love the range of ages, body types and personalities the show brings together and hope to pick up a few golf pointers along the way.

Among my goals in the coming months is to increase the frequency of posts here and share even more great girls sports information with you. If you have any topics or sports you would like me to cover, please leave me a comment! And in the meantime, check your balance – and feel free to ditch the SuperMom cape, too.

• Don’t bend your legs!
• What was that?
• You are not even trying!
• Ugh, you run slower than my Grandma!

What do those corrections mean to your athlete? Well, nothing really. They just tell her she did something wrong or she thinks you are mad at her. And, if you as a coach don’t have kids of your own, let me tell you that 99% of all kids want to do nothing more than PLEASE their coaches – especially girls.

Corrections like those do not give athletes ACTIONABLE tasks either – in other words, how will your athlete know what you are looking for if you do not specifically say it?

TIME TO SANDWICH YOUR CORRECTIONS

Instead, try making a correction sandwich! In other words, sandwich the actionable correction in between two positive statements. So, next time Susie Q. Gymnast does her vault or Janie B. Swimmer finishes her lap, try this instead:

1. PRAISE EFFORT – Tell Susie what she did RIGHT – even if you are just recognizing her for trying. Example: “Wow! I loved how fast you ran down the runway!”
2. GIVE SPECIFIC ACTIONABLE CORRECTIONS – Tell Janie what she needs to do next – and why. Example: “Breathe every four strokes, it will help you swim faster.”
3. CHALLENGE AND ENCOURAGE – Pump up your athlete. Let her know you have faith in her abilities. Example: “You can do this and I can’t wait to see it.”

I guarantee you will get athletes who are happier, more motivated, and your athletes will master their skills, decrease their times, and work better as a team!! Try it.

P.S. Giving encouragement and actionable tasks with a SMILE on your face also goes a long way.

I frequently use a variety of techniques for keeping my gymnasts motivated and having fun – like creating a “lemonade lounge” for a reward zone during conditioning, rewarding them with jumps on trampoline for performing a routine successfully, or occasionally letting them take turns being “coach” during conditioning. And sometimes we get out a bag of Skittles, smarties, or other little treat and use those as incentives to master a correction a little quicker.

My daughter’s swim coaches use Skittles in a different way. They use them as a code for what stroke the kids practice next. Each swimmer gets a skittle and then checks the white board for the color coded key. The coaches mix it up each time they play the game – sometimes one color is a dramatically more difficult task than another, but the kids still love it. They quickly eat their skittle, then jump in the water to perform the task assigned to the skittle they just ate. As soon as the task is accomplished, they are back for another one. It is definitely one of my daughter’s favorite training games.

While I have outlined how the swim coaches play the Skittle game, you can certainly adapt this game for ANY sport (or even kids chores around the house for that matter) and make it a fun addition to your athletes’ training.

This is a situation I have found myself in a few times, but most recently with my youngest daughter and swimming. I am actually glad I didn’t post about this as we were going through it as it all makes much more sense now that we have gotten past “I Quit” – at least this time.

In September when the fall swim season started, my daughter was pretty excited. She felt like the girls in her group were all her friends and she called them her “Dream Team,” and this being her second full season on the team she also started with a sense of confidence and knowing what to expect. Because my son is also swimming but in a different group, Nat gets to play with her friend before each practice as A’s sister in also in the other group. The two girls were too much fun to watch as they played, chatted and basically used that time as a transition between school and swim. I felt so relieved and was sure this year would be smooth sailing as Nat had so much to look forward to each practice.

And then she got sick. That nasty, fever raging, energy draining, in hindsight-most-likely-flu thing that took absolutely everything out of her.

She was out of school for a week. The following week when she returned to school I recommended that she go to practice. She immediately said “no” and really resisted the idea. (Clue #1 missed.) She ended up going to practice but really didn’t have her energy back which meant swimming was really hard, which equaled “really not fun” for her. That weekend there was a swim meet and she started telling me how much she hated swimming, didn’t want to compete, and wanted to QUIT.  The day before the meet she said that in a way she wanted to compete, but in the same sentence still told me she wanted to quit.

For the next two weeks, any talk of swim became a battleground. She didn’t want to go and if she did, she wouldn’t put her head under water, wouldn’t do the whole workout, and generally was miserable. She would scream at me and tell me she hated swim; she would make excuses for not wanting to put her head under water; and she was generally grouchy. (Clue #2 missed.)

Finally after really stepping back, talking with her coaches, listening to what she had to say, I figured something out – she was still recovering from her illness and being the perfectionist child she is, she thought it was easier to quit than to get back in the water and rebuild her stamina.  After more discussions, we also realized that it wasn’t until last week that she was really back to 100% .

Last week my Nat returned. After a few days of talking, confidence boosting and some distractions from her coaches, she is back in the water, excited, confident, motivated and ready for her meet this weekend!!

PARENT TIPS FOR GETTING PAST “I QUIT”

1. Look at your child’s health. Has she been sick or is she getting sick? Is she dealing with an injury?

2. Have there been any changes or dramas at school or home?

3. Stop asking “how was practice?” A very wise coaching mentor told me this once and while it is hard to do, it is a habit parents MUST break! Instead, let your child direct the conversation.

4. Listen to your child away from the sport. Is your child interested in how her teammates are doing? Does she still consider herself part of the team? Does she give you clues as to what the root of the problem may be.

5. Communicate with her coach. With the right information, the coaches can help re-establish expectations, get your daughter involved and make your daughter find her spark again.

6. Take it one step at a time. Try setting intermediate goals and praising her for reaching them. For us, it was getting Nat back in the water – even if it meant all she did was kick or swim her strokes with her head out of the water.

7. Remove unnecessary stressors. If you daughter isn’t ready to compete or to play in the game yet, then sit one out. I do encourage going to cheer on teammates still as that serves its own positive purpose, too. If you need to reduce her practice times temporarily, then do so.

8. Remind her of her commitment. Organized sports usually have some sort of commitment attached to them. By saying you need to finish the season and then you may quit, gives her the time to reconnect with her sport and decide if it is what she wants to do, and it encourages positive work ethics, too. As in, you need to finish what you start.

9. Use distractions. For example, my daughter loves it when her coach plays the Skittles game. So one thing that helped get her back to the pool was a suggestion to stop at the store and buy her coach a bag of Skittles for practice. She was so focused on buying and delivering the Skittles that the swim issue was secondary. (More tips for keeping workouts fun)

10. Be positive!! Remember that your child is a child first and an athlete second. The sport does not define her success or worth as a person and it shouldn’t define yours either. Keep your eye on the BIG picture.

This is where the coach, athlete and parental team need to come together. There are the obvious reasons to scratch an athlete – diagnosed injury or illness, but there are situations where the decision is not as clear cut.

That is the situation I find myself in today. My youngest daughter is a swimmer. Two weeks ago she came down with that icky virus that has been going around and ended up missing an entire week of school. This past week she returned to school but was so tired after a full day at school she was asking to go to bed early, couldn’t even get homework done, and was just not back to 100% yet. She went to practice twice in the past two weeks and neither one was what I would call a complete practice.

She is supposed to be at a swim meet this morning. We decided to miss it – even though we had paid for it already and her coach was fine with her swimming if she was up to it. She does not feel prepared – and as a coach for a completely different sport (gymnastics) – I know she is not. I know she could have made it through, gotten a time and survived, but she would have been disappointed in her performance.

Knowing my daughter, that would not be a motivating thing at all. It’s only one meet. It’s not the end of the world. Too often as coaches and parents we lose sight of that. Rather than pushing through today and being disappointed, my daughter is intent on going and cheering on her teammates and setting her goals for the next meet. One of those goals is staying healthy.

As a coach, do you have guidelines in place to help make the decision about competition readiness easier and more clear cut for all involved? I know at the gym we do. For us it’s a safety thing.

Any winning coach will tell you that in order to achieve success both on and off the court, it’s important to establish your own coaching philosophy.

Having a sound set of values not only keeps you focused and helps you to emphasize the right skills and techniques throughout the season, but it also gives your players, parents and colleagues a sense of what kind of program you intend to run, and who you are as a coach and mentor. Because, let’s face it, as a coach you have the unique opportunity to make a huge impact on the lives of your players. And that’s nothing to take lightly.

So here’s a quick look at how you can develop your own winning basketball coaching philosophy and start your season off right.

Step 1: Decide on your personal coaching goals. What is it that you hope to achieve as a coach? Are you in it to make a difference in the players’ lives? To satisfy a personal desire to win? Take the time to really think about why you’re doing this and what you want to get out of it. It’ll be quite helpful on those drives home after suffering a tough loss.

Step 2: Determine what life lessons you want your players to learn throughout the season. We’ve all had a coach or mentor that taught us something about the human experience that we can still apply in our lives today. What lesson will you pass on to your players? The importance of teamwork? That honesty is always the best policy? Decide now and make an effort to “impart your wisdom” in various ways throughout the season.

Step 3: Decide what you want your players to gain from their basketball experience. In addition to the life lessons that they will learn, what else will your players take away from their time on your team? Will they forge new friendships with people that they otherwise wouldn’t interact with? Improve their level of play? What will the overall experience be for your players?

Step 4: Define the meaning of success for your team. What does success mean to your team? Is it winning a certain number of games? Is it making it to a certain level of tournament play? Or are you more concerned about working effectively as a team? Create a set of attainable goals for your team and strive to achieve them.

Step 5: Determine what skills your team needs to learn or improve upon in order to achieve that success. Once you have defined “success” for your team, decide how you’re going to get there by evaluating your players and determining what skills they will need to work on. If your team’s idea of success is to keep your opponents from scoring above a specific amount of points each game, then you will most likely focus the players’ efforts on basketball defense strategies and proper basketball rebounding techniques. Be sure that for every goal that you’ve set, there is a distinct and reasonable means of attaining it.

Once you develop your coaching philosophy, write it down for your own reference; and more importantly, make it clear to players and parents alike from Day 1. By establishing and effectively communicating your principles, you’re laying the groundwork for a dynamic winning strategy that’s second to none.

USA Swimming features a really helpful article on goal setting by Dr. Amy Kimball in their series, the ABCs of Mental Training. In the article, Dr. Kimball outlines the 6 steps to effective goal setting:

1. Know where you are headed

2. Know how to get there

3. Identify milestones of success

4. Identify obstacles

5. Create a system

6. Set different types of goals

It is important that the goals athletes work with their coaches on goal setting so that intermediary goals and milestones can be set. Keeping a training journal can also be an effective way of setting goals and monitoring progress towards those goals. (Feel free to print out the training journal pages we created just for girls!)